Friday
May 27 2005

Volume 33
Issue 21

IN THE SGN

Saturday,
Nov 07, 2009
04:14
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Arts & Entertainment  
General Gayety by Leslie Robinson
The view from above
Two Gay angels lie on their stomachs atop a fluffy cloud and look down on earth.

“I have a confession to make,” says Nathan. “When I heard about that mayor of Spokane, Jim West, I giggled. I feel terrible for laughing at a man when he’s down.

“Don’t be so holier-than-thou. You know full well we all laughed, the entire Heavenly Gay and Lesbian Chorus. On key, of course,” responds Annie.

“Still. The man has got to be humiliated.”

“He better be, the S.O.B.”

“Annie! That’s not very Christian of you.”

“I’m a Buddhist, Nathan.”

“Oh yeah.”

“He had a stellar anti-Gay record as a legislator in Washington state,” Annie says. “Co-sponsored a bill to keep us from working in schools and day-care centers, for Lord’s sake. Voted against giving out information on how to avoid HIV.”

Nathan nods. “True.”

“When the newspaper went public about his dallying with young men, West first blathered he wasn’t really Gay. Now that he’s in such hot water, he’s saying stuff like, ‘I am being destroyed because I am a Gay man.’ Cry me a river.”

“That’s what I like about you, Annie. You’re so reticent.”

“Don’t waste your time on him,” she says. “Worry about soloing tomorrow on ‘My Boyfriend’s Back’.”

“Think about what his life has been like. Fighting that internal battle. The struggle between what he wants and what he believes is right.”

“Nathan, explain this to me. I’ve never heard of a famously homophobic female turning out to be Gay. But it seems almost common that a guy who spends his days bitching about fags really wants to be some fag’s bitch. What is that? Nathan?”

“Sorry. Think I see my last boyfriend down there going into a Chinese restaurant. You know what Hoisin sauce does to you, you fool!”

“He can’t hear you. So what’s the answer?”

Nathan sighs. “Self-loathing.” Confusion. The schism between what you’re taught and what you feel.”

“Lots of us are taught to hate ourselves. We excel at that. But most of us don’t wind up attacking others who are like us.”

Nathan nods. Annie continues, “Do these people have to go after us to show the world they’re straight? Can’t they just leave us alone and live their lie quietly?

“Nathan says, “Oh great, now he’s going Indian instead. If you order a mango lassi, I’m not responsible for what happens!”

“Nathan! Get your head back in the clouds!”

“Sorry Annie.”

“I’ll tell you another thing. If it turns out West did molest kids, as he now stands accused of doing, then he’s an even bigger pain to us for giving ammunition to those who claim Gay men are pedophiles‚” she says.

“Maybe this is a simple case of karma,” Nathan says. “Having spent his career treating Gays as inferior beings, West now has to live as one of those beings, with absolutely everyone knowing it. I think it proves The Big Guy has a sense of humor.”

“The Big Girl, and I never doubted it. Hey, look at that billboard in Dallas, the one PFLAG put up.”

Nathan reads, “Be careful who you hate, it may be someone you love.”

“In West’s case, it could be someone in the mirror.”

Annie turns over onto her back. “If you’re Gay and you feel you need to be in the closet, that’s one thing. But if you’re Gay and you gaybash from inside that closet, that’s quite another thing. Then you’re on your own, bucko.”

Nathan says, “Maybe you’ll feel more generous when time has passed.”

“Heaven forbid.”



Leslie Robinson likes the idea of hanging out on clouds. E-mail her at LesRobinsn@aol.com, and read her work at www.GeneralGayety.com.


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