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Love Welcomes All conference offers compassionate option to Focus on the Family gathering

Love Welcomes All conference offers compassionate option to Focus on the Family gathering
picture above - Bob & Marylou Wallner God loves you just the way you are. by Robert Raketty - SGN Staff Writer While Focus on the Family prepares to bring its damaging message that there is a way out of the homosexual life to Northshore Baptist Church in Bothell during Gay Pride Weekend, PFLAG, Pacific NW Reconciling Ministries and the Religious Coalition for Equality will host their own conference, Love Welcomes All, at Newport Presbyterian Church in Bellevue on Saturday, July 9. The event will include experts on the harmful effects of reparative therapy, parents of LGBT people who have struggled with the issue, and a former ex-Gay man who will talk about the fallacy of believing that Gay people can change to straight through religion and therapy. Scheduled to speak at the Love Welcomes All conference: Douglas C. Haldeman, Ph.D., a counseling psychologist and a member of the clinical faculty at the University of Washingtons Psychology Department. He is also the current President of the Association of Practicing Psychologists, and a the recipient of a 2005 American Psychological Associations Presidential Citation in recognition of his work on behalf of LGBT psychology. Haldeman co-authored the APAs Guidelines for Psychotherapy with Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Clients as well as the organizations Resolution on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation. Bob & Mary Lou Wallner will share how their own religious upbringing and background contributed to the suicide of their daughter, and how the experience has transformed their lives into activism for the acceptance and rights of LGBT people. In 2002, the couple founded To Educate About the Consequences of Homophobia (TEACH) Ministries, a nonprofit organization that seeks to educate others about LGBT people and dispel myths and fears about their lives. Kathy Reim, the PFLAG coordinator for Washington State, will talk about her own journey after learning her daughter is a Lesbian. She is an experienced educator and now works in the field of dispute resolution. Ron Poindexter is a former ex-Gay man who reconciled his evangelical Christian faith and his sexual orientation after seven years of ex-Gay ministries and reparative therapy. He holds a Master of Divinity from Fuller Theological Seminary and has completed the ordination process in the Presbyterian Church, USA. For more information about the Love Welcomes All conference or to register, visit www.lovewelcomesall-wa.org or call Bellevue PFLAG at (206) 325-7724. ITS NEITHER REPARATIVE NOR THERAPY Mainstream medical and psychological organizations have condemned therapy methods that claim to change a persons sexual orientation. On its website, the American Psychological Association states: Even though most homosexuals live successful, happy lives, some homosexual or Bisexual people may seek to change their sexual orientation through therapy, sometimes pressured by the influence of family members or religious groups to try and do so. The reality is that homosexuality is not an illness. It does not require treatment and is not changeable. Marc Adams, the executive director of Seattle-based HeartStrong, a nonprofit that provides outreach services to LGBT youth attending religious educational institutions and author of the critically acclaimed book, The Preachers Son, told the SGN last February that so called reparative therapy is neither reparative or therapy. He had graduated from a Christian high school, before attending Jerry Falwells Liberty University. Later, he would receive reparative therapy from the now defunct Texas-based Last Days Ministries. I think the most important thing that people need to remember when observing things like the Love Won Out conferences are the differences between us and those participating, said Adams. Their definition of love is very different from ours. And its important for people to understand what their definition of love really is. I would bet that the vast majority of SGN readers couldnt give a definition of what someone involved in that would define love as. The other thing we must remember is that the Gay persons who get involved in reparative therapy are always doing it for the same reason...acceptance. If you arent accepted by the God you believe in, then life isnt worth it.... If you arent accepted by your religious family and friends, then you are living your life wrong. Their brand of Christianity is all about living a life acceptable to the God they believe in. If you arent doing that...because you are having struggles, as they call it, with homosexuality or struggles with any other sin, then you must adjust your life. Reparative therapy or restorative therapy as they are calling it, is just another way to attempt to live your life so that it is acceptable to God. Unfortunately for most of our Gay brothers and sisters caught up in this cult like way of thinking, they choose reparative therapy and then ultimately must choose emotional or physical suicide. The worst thing we could ever do is try to shame someone who is caught up in reparative therapy. It will only lead them into further exploration of it. OUT OF FOCUS Focus on the Familys one-day conference, titled Love Won Out, is one of five being held this year nationwide. Focus on the Family is a Colorado-based fundamentalist religious organization that condemns the Gay lifestyle on Saturday, June 25 As the homosexual life is celebrated in Gay Pride events throughout Seattle, we will be there to offer a different message one of hope and healing for those who dont share that sense of pride, said Mike Haley, Director of Gender Issues for Focus on the Family. According to the conference website, www.lovewonout.org, participants will learn how to...prevent [their] child from embracing this destructive way of life. Nancy Heche, the mother of actress Anne Heche, will join the conference lineup for the first time during the Bothell event. Her daughter had a longtime relationship with comedian Ellen DeGeneres before their breakup in 2000 and was married to closeted Baptist minister who died from complications related to AIDS in 1983. Christopher Norfleet, a spokesperson for Focus on the Family, told the Seattle Gay News that Heche was not doing interviews and would not be available for comment. The event is being co-sponsored by Exodus International, an organization that claims to offer freedom from homosexuality through the power of Jesus Christ. Exodus International was based in Seattle from Sept. 1996 until Feb. 2001, before relocating to its current location in Orlando. Northshore Baptist Church claims to offer similar services. According the churchs website, a support group for the homosexual struggler is held as part of its Love is Gods Healing Truth (LIGHT) Ministry. The brochure asks, Do you desire to love God, yet desire to be loved in a way God prohibits? In 1999, Focus on the Family brought a similar conference to Calvary Fellowship Church in Mountlake Terrace. The day-long event was aimed at Seattle-area teachers, counselors and parents and discussed how to treat and prevent homosexuality and how to combat the so-called pro-Gay agenda in schools. Two Gay rights organizations, Dyke Action Committee and Dyke Community Activists, picketed outside. The conference has been held in 30 cities worldwide and has often been met with resistance from the local LGBT community and its allies.


Dr. Doug Haldeman


Kathy Reim


Ron Poindexter