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January 1, 2007

NEW THIS WEEK:

The Good Shepherd

Bureaucrat Joseph Wilson (Matt Damon) becomes a key figure in the establishment of the Central Intelligence Agency in the years after World War II, despite the toll that his devotion to duty takes on his wife (Angelina Jolie) and others in his life. While director Robert DeNiro paints his tale on a vast canvas - and makes the movie supremely handsome to look at - The Good Shepherd is exceedingly dull. The casting is top-notch - supporting players include Alec Baldwin, William Hurt, John Turturro, and even DeNiro himself; but whose decision was it to cast Jolie as a neglected wife who sits around waiting for her husband to come home? This spy saga is overloaded with intelligence, but could use more liveliness.

Grade: C
Kinsey Scale: 1.5 (A gay spy played by Michael Gambon comes to a bitter end because of his sexual orientation, as Damon's character stands by and watches. The famously bisexual Jolie played legendary lesbian supermodel Gia Carangi in HBO's Gia ; Hurt won an Oscar for his gay turn in Kiss of the Spider Woman ; Damon played a gay sociopath in The Talented Mr. Ripley ; Turturro was a gay mobster in Miller's Crossing ; and costar Billy Crudup played a cross-dressing theater star in Stage Beauty .)

Night at the Museum

Larry Daley (Ben Stiller) is a down-on-his-luck divorced dad who gets a job as a night watchman at a natural history museum. On his first night, he learns that the museum is cursed and that everything inside comes to life until the sun rises. His job? Control the chaos and hopefully reverse the curse. Of course, the story is secondary to the wild antics of animated dinosaur bones that want to play fetch, marauding Huns, and a naughty monkey that has it in for Stiller. And if it's nothing audiences haven't seen before from movies like Jurassic Park and Jumanji , it's still reasonably fun, amiably inoffensive family entertainment for the holidays - no more and no less. Parents, lower your expectations, give in to the kid-centricity, and you'll be fine.
 
Grade: B-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Stiller played a metrosexual in Zoolander . Co-stars with queer credits include Robin Williams, who starred in The Birdcage and The Night Listener , and cross-dressed his way through Mrs. Doubtfire ; and Paul Rudd, who played gay in The Object of My Affection .)

Rocky Balboa

Over-the-hill boxer Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone) spends his days missing his late wife, Adrian, and regaling the patrons of his Philadelphia restaurant with stories of his boxing prowess back in the day. But when a computer simulation shows Rocky defeating the current heavyweight champ, Mason "The Line" Dixon (Antonio Taver), it's time to crank up the training montages as the old slugger decides to go for another 12 rounds. Once Rocky starts running up those stairs - and dealing with the objections of his estranged son (Milo Ventimiglia) - Rocky Balboa starts hitting every single note of 1976's Rocky all over again. And if this new movie isn't as crowd-pleasing as the original, it's better than that dreadful Rocky V . Rocky Balboa is no knock-out, but it wins on points.

Grade: B-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Co-star Burt Young played the father of a transgender woman in Transamerica and the father of a lesbian in Kiss the Bride , while Talia Shire - who surfaces here as the ghost of Rocky's late wife - was the object of Elizabeth Ashley's psychotic desire in the lesbian exploitation stinker Windows .)

ALSO IN THEATERS:

Apocalypto

When young Mayan hunter Jaguar Paw's (Rudy Youngblood) village is attacked and destroyed, he is captured by a dying civilization bent on sacrificing him and his fellow villagers. After escaping, he must beat his captors home to save his pregnant wife, while facing perilous obstacles every step of the way. What follows is running, torture, and gore, and then more running, torture, and gore. Apocalypto isn't exactly an art film, but as a tarted-up action flick, it delivers the goods. And if director Mel Gibson's Mayan-language film fails by thinking it's saying something important when it's really just an excuse to revel in bloodshed, at least the bloodshed is wildly entertaining and atmospheric - just not for the weak of stomach.

Grade: B+
Kinsey Scale: 0 (Gibson has made homophobic statements to the press in the past.)

Blood Diamond

In Sierra Leone, mercenary Danny Archer (Leonardo DiCaprio) and fisherman Solomon Vandy (Djimon Hounsou) reluctantly partner to recover a rare pink diamond. While Archer simply seeks a big score, Vandy needs the cash the stone will bring in order to reunite his family in the war-torn region. Edward Zwick's lengthy drama is part straightforward action adventure; part heavy-handed civics lesson on the diamond trade's role in financing African conflicts; and part contrived romance, once Archer meets journalist Maddy Bowen (Jennifer Connelly). Hounsou is moving as a desperate man fighting against the odds, and the drama is powerful when it focuses on Vandy's situation. But it's too bad that the film is mostly about Archer; DiCaprio's performance is weak, and his character is mostly unbelievable.

Grade: C
Kinsey Scale: 1 (DiCaprio played queer poet Arthur Rimbaud in Total Eclipse . Connelly won an Oscar for playing the wife of probably bisexual John Nash in A Beautiful Mind . Co-star Jimi Mistry appeared in the gay romantic comedy Touch of Pink .)

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

Kazakhstan journalist Borat Sagdiyev (Sacha Baron Cohen) - that nation's "sixth most famous man" - travels across the United States to learn about America, but his adventures mostly involve embarrassing the natives he's duped into showing him around. "Duped" because, of course, Borat is one of the characters created by comedian Baron Cohen for Da Ali G Show . While Borat is a racist, sexist, homophobic twit who hilariously mangles the English language - he describes sex as "making sexy-time" - the real joke in this satirical Candid Camera -style "documentary" is on the Yanks, who are unfailingly polite in the face of Borat's weirdness, and ignorant enough about Kazakhstan to take his blatherings at face value. Their discomfort and Baron Cohen's brilliant adherence to character result in one of the year's funniest movies.

Grade: A
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Borat is all about making sexy-time with the ladies, but he does wear one of the craziest thongs you've ever seen; he also wrestles naked with his producer. Another of Baron Cohen's Da Ali G Show creations is gay fashionista Bruno. Baron Cohen also played the gay NASCAR driver in Talladega Nights .)

Casino Royale

In this rebooting of the series, British military intelligence agent James Bond (Daniel Craig) no sooner earns his double-0 status than he's in hot pursuit of Le Chiffre (Mads Mikkelsen), an accountant to terrorists worldwide. Le Chiffre has lost his investors' money, but he plans to win it back in a high-stakes poker game - unless Bond can beat him, of course. Craig proves himself to be just about perfect as the latest 007, a cold-blooded tough guy who's both brutish and sexy. Eva Green makes for one of the more three-dimensional Bond girls - she's actually disturbed after watching him kill an assailant - and the film is smart enough to fool you into expecting one resolution and then spring another. Bond - and Bond movies - haven't been this exciting in ages.

Grade: A-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Craig kissed Toby Stephens in Infamous , the second of the Truman Capote biopics, while Green was the female corner of a pansexual love triangle in Bernardo Bertolucci's The Dreamers . Jeffrey Wright, seen here as one of the poker players, won Tony and Emmy awards for his portrayal of no-nonsense gay nurse Belize in Tony Kushner's Angels in America .)

Charlotte's Web

Young Fern (Dakota Fanning) rescues runt pig Wilber (voice of Dominic Scott Kay), but it's going to take even greater intervention to save him later, when he's ready to be turned into bacon. And that's where spider Charlotte (voice of Julia Roberts) comes in to save the day in this charming adaptation of the classic E.B. White novel. Hollywood hasn't always done right by White - the 1970s animated feature gave Fern short shrift, while the Stuart Little movies lacked the quiet dignity of the books - but this new version captures the gentle qualities that have made the book perennially popular. Thanks to an all-star voice cast and Babe -style computer animation, the film brings White's beloved animal characters to very realistic life. Kids and adults alike will be won over by the results.

Grade: A
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Steve Buscemi, who voices Templeton the Rat, made a memorable screen debut as a gay rock star with AIDS in Bill Sherwood's Parting Glances , and Robert Redford - Ike the Horse here - played a bisexual movie star married to Natalie Wood in Inside Daisy Clover . Oprah Winfrey and Kathy Bates, who both have queer movie credits, also provide voice talent.)

Deck the Halls

Suburban optometrist Steve Finch (Matthew Broderick) loves Christmas, but his Yuletide spirit deflates when his new neighbor, Buddy Hall (Danny DeVito), becomes determined to decorate his house with so many lights that it can be seen from space. Squabbling over Buddy's display turns into an all-out war that threatens to ruin not just the holiday, but the men's marriages. There is not an original scene in this formulaic, completely predictable family comedy, which further suffers from uneven pacing and dead spots that bring the action to a grinding halt. Nevertheless, it has a few funny moments, thanks to the actors' energetic performances and DeVito's truculent charm. Most enchanting of all is the dazzling, if garish, light show that graces the Halls' home, the movie's true star.

Grade: C
Kinsey Scale: 1 (There is no real queer content, although Steve goes into a panic when he discovers that the town's otherwise straight sheriff is a transvestite. Broderick's queer credits include roles in The Producers , Strangers with Candy , and Torch Song Trilogy . Co-star Kristin Davis was Sex and the City 's Charlotte and guest-starred on Will & Grace . Co-star Kristin Chenoweth's queer-themed projects have included Running with Scissors .)

Deja Vu

ATF agent Doug Carlin (Denzel Washington) must travel back in time to prevent a terrorist incident. Meanwhile, he's also trying to save the life of a woman (Paula Patton) who may or may not be indirectly connected with the terrorists. Washington has played a self-important pill so often lately - Man on Fire , John Q. - that it's genuinely exciting to see him have fun on screen again in this admittedly silly action-adventure. The time-travel sequences feel like a theme-park attraction, and there's a "we're-tired-of-feeling-helpless-about-terrorism" undercurrent to the proceedings, but the movie winds up being an entertaining night at the movies - even by Jerry "let's blow stuff up" Bruckheimer standards.

Grade: B-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Washington played the homophobic lawyer in Philadelphia . Co-star Val Kilmer played gay in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and starred in the gay-subtext-heavy action epics Top Gun and Batman Forever .)

Dreamgirls

The Dreamettes, a Detroit trio, seem destined for stardom when up-and-coming record mogul Curtis Taylor Jr. (Jamie Foxx) signs them to his label. Both big-voiced Effie (Jennifer Hudson) and beautiful Deena (Beyonce Knowles) are in love with Curtis, and jealousy threatens to tear the group apart when Curtis promotes Deena to lead vocalist. Twenty-five years after its Broadway debut, this lavish musical explodes on the silver screen in all of its big-haired, '60s-era glory. The songs are trite and director Bill Condon's frantic editing deflates the drama's power, but the gorgeous costumes, superb art direction, and superior acting make up for those sins. Best of all is former American Idol contestant Hudson, who emerges as the movie's true star, thanks to her sensational soulful performance.

Grade: B
Kinsey Scale: 2 (Condon, who wrote the screenplay as well as directs, is gay, as are co-producer David Geffen and composer Henry Krieger. So were original Broadway director Michael Bennett and lyricist Tom Eyen, who also wrote the book of the musical. Condon wrote the screenplay for Chicago , won the screenwriting Oscar for his queer drama, Gods and Monsters , and made the bi drama Kinsey . Co-star Danny Glover appeared in The Color Purple .)

The Good German

New Republic reporter Jake Geismer (George Clooney) travels to Germany in the waning days of World War II to cover the Potsdam peace conference. While there, he gets caught up in intrigue involving a former lover (Cate Blanchett), a shady Army wheeler-dealer (Tobey Maguire), and the American government's attempts to smuggle Nazi rocket scientists out of the country before the Russians can get them. It all sounds exciting, but this Steven Soderbergh production is a big snooze, featuring characters you won't care about. Meanwhile, the cinematography tries for a classic 1940s-noir feel - even the poster is designed to look like the one for Casablanca - but does not live up to those heights, making it seem like not only was the plot drained of life, but the movie itself was drained of color.

Grade: C-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Blanchett played the object of Judi Dench's affections in Notes on a Scandal , and Maguire was memorably bedded by Robert Downey Jr. in Wonder Boys .)

Happy Feet

Emperor penguins employ their own unique sound - their heartsong - to attract mates, but young Mumbles (Elijah Wood) was born to dance, not sing, and the other birds ostracize him. But when a fish shortage leads to famine, this spurned outsider holds the key to the colony's survival. Peppered throughout with bad cover versions of old pop hits, this animated musical fable occasionally plays like an extra-special episode of American Idol with penguins. More damaging is the quality of the computer animation, which lends the flightless birds a lifeless appearance. Emphasis on predators will frighten young children, while the icky sentimentality may put off grownups. Only when Mumbles cuts loose with his energetic tap routines (courtesy of motion-captured dance great Savion Glover) does this bird-brained saga soar.

Grade: C+
Kinsey Scale: 1 (No queer content, but several of the vocal talents involved have gay and lesbian projects on their resumes, including Robin Williams, Nicole Kidman, Hugh Jackman, and Hugo Weaving.)

The Holiday

L.A.-based movie marketer Amanda (Cameron Diaz) and English wedding columnist Iris (Kate Winslet) swap houses over Christmas. Both women are nursing broken hearts, but despite each vowing to spend a man-free holiday, Amanda falls for Iris' brother Graham (Jude Law), while Iris warms to Amanda's friend Miles (Jack Black). Writer-director Nancy Meyers seems intent on taxing the patience of all but the most devoted romantic comedy fans with a thin premise, few laughs, unbelievable situations, an absurd length of well over two hours, and characters that are not always likable. And for a romance, it seems odd that the most satisfying relationship in it isn't either of the love matches, but instead the touching friendship that Iris forms with elderly screenwriter Arthur (Eli Wallach).
 
Grade: C
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Winslet's breakthrough role was as a teenage lesbian in Heavenly Creatures . Law had early parts in Bent and Wilde , and co-starred in the homoerotic The Talented Mr. Ripley . Black and co-star Ed Burns both guest-starred on Will & Grace . Co-star Rufus Sewell appeared in the queer dramas Carrington and A Man of No Importance .)

The Nativity Story

Mary (Keisha Castle-Hughes) is impregnated immaculately and has to head to Bethlehem with Joseph (Oscar Isaac). There's a lack of inn space, and Jesus is born in a stable. Meanwhile, it's difficult to know if this straight-faced, literal take on the Nativity story is subtextually meant to be something more (it's directed by Thirteen 's Catherine Hardwicke), or if, in fact, it's just supposed to be a straight-faced, literal take on the Nativity story. The execution suggests the latter, and without any controversy (a factor in The Passion of the Christ 's huge box-office take), the movie's audience is going to be limited to devoutly religious people who want to feel like they're in Sunday School.

Grade: C+
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Hardwicke's Thirteen featured mildly homoerotic moments.)

The Pursuit of Happyness

Behind on the rent and barely scraping by with 5-year-old son Christopher (Jaden Smith) to support, salesman Chris Gardener (Will Smith) cannot afford to work for free. He accepts an unpaid internship at a brokerage firm anyway, convinced that becoming a stockbroker will ensure a brighter future. This 1980s-era drama is never more than a handsome soap opera, despite a terrific, uncommonly serious turn by the elder Smith. Its message is bizarre, since it suggests that money - and lots of it - really does buy happiness, and, in fact, may be the only real avenue to achieve it. The story only ever satisfies in the intimate, moving moments between father and son, as little Jaden Smith steals every scene from his real-life dad.

Grade: B-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Will Smith played a gay man in Six Degrees of Separation and produced the lesbian romantic comedy Saving Face . Co-star Thandie Newton appeared in Interview with a Vampire , while co-star Kurt Fuller had a recurring role on Desperate Housewives and a small part in Auto Focus .)

The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause

Santa Claus - aka Scott Calvin (Tim Allen) - is expecting his first child with the new Mrs. Claus (Elizabeth Mitchell), and the whole family gathers for the blessed event, including Scott's son, his first wife, and his new in-laws (Ann-Margret, Alan Arkin). But like all holiday get-togethers, this one has its share of complications, most notably the appearance of Jack Frost (Martin Short), who wants to elbow Santa out of the way and make Christmas his own. While this holiday series has suffered from the law of diminishing comic and heart-warmth returns - David Krumholz's Head Elf from previous installments is sorely missed - The Santa Clause 3 retains enough of the first two films' charm to make it worth taking the kids when your feet need a rest after a full day of shopping.

Grade: B-
Kinsey Scale: 1 (Director Michael Lembeck was also behind the drag-queen farce Connie and Carla . Short played flamboyantly queeny characters in The Big Picture and the Father of the Bride movies. Ann-Margret played the mother of a gay man in the landmark TV movie Our Sons , while Arkin co-starred in Little Miss Sunshine and played Grace's dad on Will & Grace .)

Stranger Than Fiction

Novelist Kay Eiffel's (Emma Thompson) latest work chronicles the life of shy IRS agent Harold Crick (Will Ferrell) as he falls in love with rebellious baker Ana Pascal (Maggie Gyllenhaal). As Kay ponders her book's ending, the very real Harold begins to hear her voice narrating his every move and determines to discover the identity of the mysterious storyteller who seems to be deciding his fate. An abundance of charm and great, good humor are this gentle, surreal comedy's chief assets. The entire cast is flat-out wonderful, particularly Ferrell. Normally so boisterous in his movies, he is sensational here, cast against type as the introverted, awkward, quiet Harold. The ending is a little weak, but until that point, this is a comedy that fires on all cylinders.

Grade: A-
Kinsey Scale: 1.5 (Ferrell starred in The Producers and the metrosexual comedy Zoolander . Among Thompson's queer credits are roles in Angels in America and Carrington . Gyllenhaal worked with John Waters in Cecil B. Demented and appeared in Don Roos' queer romantic comedy Happy Endings . Co-star Queen Latifah played a lesbian in Set It Off and received an Oscar nomination for her role in the queer-friendly Chicago . Gay actor Tom Hulce has a small role.)