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Wednesday, Oct 08, 2008
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Lipstick and Lust |
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| Asteroid fantasies and SPD officer fantasies | ||
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by Rajkhet Dirzhud-Rashid -
SGN A&E Writer As I sit here writing, an asteroid about eight miles across is making its way to a "fly by" with Earth. NASA scientists are saying it won't hit the Earth, but if it does, you won't be reading this and know I loved you all, my dahling fans. Okay, I'll lay off the disaster fantasies I've been having (which actually caused a dear friend to call me back and chastise me for "getting me all worked up" about the fact that we might have a mild earthquake), but hey, what can an Aquarian with Leo in Uranus do, eh? I actually was born in the middle of a hurricane and strange things have been happening around me ever since. Still, my psychic sense hasn't seen anything more major than more of this horrid cold weather we've been having, so no worries. I did let myself think, though, that if something did fly off the above-mentioned asteroid, I'd love to be near a certain officer of the law when that happened and do a class-A movie kiss with that one. Heck, with the fantasies I've been having about that one of late, a kiss could be considered mild. Just can't help wondering if the muscles under that uniform feel as good as they look and I'm just dying to find out - though if that does happen, I'll probably keep it to myself, to keep that one's rep all intact and all. So there, big boy, how's about it? Anyhow, this one also did get out for her birthday last weekend, and let me tell you, don't let Scorpios throw your party, as things can get pretty weird. From now on, that one and this one will probably just have dinner somewhere in town, instead of hiking to Timbuktu for a dinner party. But this one did have some fun on Saturday last weekend, when an amenable Leo bottom turned his body over to this little sadist to torture at The Wet Spot (and I got my new membership card, so hey, let the new adventures begin!). Unfortunately, some folks I'd hoped would show up to help me eat cake (and maybe do me) weren't on hand, so we're hoping a trip back this week for the late night dance/SM night (The Grind) will prove more satisfying, if you know what I mean. We'll see and will definitely fill you in later via the blog for this column. Oh, and I did finally get to see that video Craig Ferguson mentioned where Tom Cruise (the guy who was jumping on Oprah's couch and who reamed Brooke Shields for taking anti-depressants to combat postpartum depression) is giving his views on Scientology. Yikes, this man is creepier than that film Left Behind, which promises viewers a "little preview" of the upcoming "rapture" and events before this supposed biblical event. I've never seen Kirk Cameron (Family Ties) the same since, and whatever remained of the crush I once had on Cruise from his Top Gun days is so over. Again, yikes! Ah, and speaking of stars I'm "so over," Bruce Willis, shame on you for endorsing homophobe Mike Huckabee. Me, my money's on Obama. Though I really wish a socialist/feminist candidate would emerge, I know that's not gonna happen, so I'm for Barack. Ah, but some day, some day& Also, this one is nearly over round two of "the cold from hell," or as I like to call it, "the global warming cold," and thanks to lots of baked lemons, ginger tea and much sleep, my voice is back, too. Now if I could just shake these sniffles and cough, I'd be sooo happy. Healers, send your good vibes my way, yes? Oh, and it seems me and the Bonney Lake "sanitation engineer" might have a future, as this one got an e-mail back after she mentioned a trip to Tacoma, and wanting to meet up with that one. Keep ya posted. Meanwhile, I have my eyes (and had my chest) on a certain Louisiana hottie, new to The Wet Spot, who has a rack this one is desperate to get her hot little hands on. Nothing like a curvy femme to get me all worked up, and the girl has red hair, so I gotta have her! And I will, I promise you that, my little chocolate hearts. So, what did this one try in the middle of all of this lusting, disaster-fantasizing and surviving the bitter winter cold? Well, I'm delighted with my new Make Up Forever Power Powder in a glowy gold/pink and wear it at least twice a week, whether I'm going out on the town, or just to Trader Joe's. Hey, never know when my fave hot clerk will be there, eh? And I also love, love, love Dolce and Gabbana's The One eau de parfum, which this one tried recently and definitely got noticed wearing. That you can get at Nordstrom's, and do try Philosophy's Raspberry Sorbet body scrub and take that little momentary vacation out of winter to someplace much nicer. This and the Make Up Forever Power Powder you can pick up at this one's fave store, Sephora. So, that's it for now and I just want to thank the DJs who keep playing Dead Confederate's "The Rat" and MonNDCF's "Escape From City Scrapers," both of which make me very happy. And to DJ El Toro, honey, just lose the pretentious voice thing, please! Oh, and I still say Cloverfield sucks, no matter how well it's doing at the box office, and Teeth is the best film this critic has seen in a long time, no matter what other less enlightened critics have to say. Ignore them and see it anyway, and avoid Cloverfield, unless you just like being bored, or are a twelve year old. Also, do feel free to e-mail me at ijanaral@yahoo.com and check out the blog of this column, too. Be nice to each other, fear less, do more acts of kindness and think warm thoughts, my little puppy kisses. Buhbye! |
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