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Back to Section One | Back to Arts & Entertainment
posted Friday, February 10, 2012 - Volume 40 Issue 06
General Gayety: You are invited
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General Gayety: You are invited

by Leslie Robinson - SGN Contributing Writer

I'm thinking of starting a new career. With the state of Washington on a path to legalizing same-sex marriage, it's the right time here in the Evergreen State to get into the wedding invitation business. For a modest fee, I plan to offer specialized invitation text, suited just for the couple.

I've knocked out some examples. Imagine unsealing a hand-lettered envelope and withdrawing a regal invitation graced with one of the following announcements:

Benjamin Paul Corday and Jack Simon Mikkelsen request the pleasure of your company in celebrating their union of marriage on Saturday, the nineteenth of May, two thousand and twelve, at one o'clock in the afternoon, at Tacoma Lutheran Church. Unless the pastor changes his mind again.

Jim and Arlene Trent and Stu and Suzy Levy invite you to the wedding of their daughters, Sarah Elizabeth Trent and Candace Opal Levy, on Saturday, the eighteenth of August, two thousand and twelve, at six o'clock at Golden Gardens Park, Seattle. Dinner, dancing, and writing thank-you notes to legislators to follow.

Sally Ann Miller and Deborah Casey Putnam request the honor of your presence as we marry for a fourth time. No gifts, please. We're out of space.

Barry Edward Miller and Archibald Chi Wong invite you to join them in celebrating their marriage in the card room of the Westhaven Retirement Home 10 minutes after Gay marriage becomes legal.

Mr. and Mrs. Alan Slater hold their noses and invite you to join them as their son David Riley Slater marries that man on Saturday, the seventh of July, two thousand and twelve, at five o'clock in the evening, Bellevue First Congregational Church.

Dinesh and Chandra Gupta request the honor of your presence and blessings on the auspicious occasion of the wedding ceremony of our daughter Ahanti to & a man! Our girl fooled us again.

Peter O'Malley and Mark Shaughnessy invite you to their wedding on the steps of St. James Cathedral in Seattle on Sunday, June 10th, at 10:00 in the morning. Dress for possible arrest.

Cynthia Simmons Bartlett and Moonstone request that you get your butts over here to our place on Lummi Island for the mother of all union celebrations to take place on the summer solstice. Potluck.

Abigail Sage Hernandez-Martin invites you to join her in celebrating the marriage of her Daddy and her Papa at her house in Spokane. She will look unbearably cute, so you should bring your cameras.

The honor of your presence is requested at the reaffirmation of wedding vows of Grace Branson (formerly Herbert Branson) and Melinda Branson on Saturday, September 8th, 2012, at 6:00 p.m. at their home in Olympia. Still going strong after 35 years and a few twists and turns!

Leslie Robinson hasn't yet written her own wedding invitation. Email her at lesarobinson@gmail.com, and visit her blog at www.generalgayety.com for daily LGBT funnies.

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