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Zoey Martinez's family and friends speak out on Trans Day of Remembrance

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Photo by Renee Raketty
Photo by Renee Raketty

The Diversity Alliance of Puget Sound (DAPS) held a memorial and candlelight vigil on the Transgender Day of Remembrance at both the Washington State History Museum in Tacoma and the University Universalist Unitarian Church in Seattle.

The Transgender Day of Remembrance was established in 1999 by Gwendolyn Ann Smith, who wanted to commemorate the brutal murder of Rita Hester.

Photo by Renee Raketty  

"The annual event, which celebrates the lives of Trans and gender-diverse individuals lost, falls on November 20 each year, and seeks to combat Trans violence, stigma, and erasure," said Oliver Webb, chairperson of DAPS, at the Tacoma vigil. "The most important function of TDOR is to restore dignity, to change the narrative that has been written about our loved ones after a hate crime has occurred."

Since 2010, over 328 Transgender and gender-diverse people were murdered in the United States and territories, according to DAPS. This year has been the most devastating when it comes to such deaths. At least 56 Transgender people were killed, the majority of whom were Black or Latinx women. Washington State lost two Trans lives this year: 20-year-old Zoella "Zoey" Martinez and 39-year-old Rikkey Outumuro.

Oliver Webb — Photo by Renee Raketty  

"Behind the statistical representation of numbers and percentages, there are real people whose lives we value and whom as society has failed to protect," Webb said.

Webb also discussed how social and sex work stigmas expose Trans people to exploitation and violence.

"These victims, like all of us, are loving partners, parents, family members, friends, and community members," Webb said. "These individuals were more than names on a list or political pawns."

"Thank you for being beautifully brave and resilient. You are valued, and you are loved," Webb said.

The Transgender lives lost were taken by acquaintances, partners, and strangers. In some cases, there was clear anti-Trans violence, while in other cases, they may have been put at risk in other ways, such as forced unemployment, houselessness, and survival sex work. Microaggressions and systemic barriers within society have allowed hate to fester, which leads to fatal violence.

Webb encouraged Transgender allies to use their voices to speak out against aggression and violence. He also mentioned that allies have an obligation to educate and lead by example when it comes to erasing ignorance.

Photo by Renee Raketty  

Speakers
The SGN's Renee Raketty, an out Trans journalist, was the first speaker at the Tacoma event.

"I recognize I'm only one of the few Trans journalists here in the Seattle market," Raketty said. "The truth is, if you're not telling our stories, other people are, and too often those stories are [told] with learned bias and misinformation about our lives."

Raketty uses her voice as a reporter to bring attention to issues in the LGBTQ+ community. Her livestream "Renee Reports" focus heavily on issues facing the Transgender and nonbinary community.

"Our lives should not be up for debate, and our journeys should not be devalued," Raketty said.

After Raketty, Sephora Commorato, interim food services director at William Booth House, took the stage. Commorato is a Black Transgender woman, and she brought up how she was slightly nervous on stage since she isn't used to public speaking.

"My experiences are lived and survived," Commorato said. "It's been really hard to stop and think that I'm a statistic. In more ways than one."

"Being a pillar for your community — that is fucking exhausting," she added. "It's tiring. I am tired. I am so tired of looking at the news and seeing girls' faces that look just like mine."

Speaker of the House Laurie Jinkins and Tacoma City Councilmember Kristina Walker were also in attendance.

Craig Martinez — Photo by Renee Raketty  

Zoey's family
Craig Martinez, father of Zoella "Zoey" Martinez, who was gunned down and dumped in a Seattle alley in August, also spoke.

"The reason we're here is... somber, yet we're connected by loved ones we all lost," Martinez said. "Zoella was our Transgender daughter."

Martinez brought up how, until the age of 16, Zoella went by a different name. Prior to coming out as Trans, she was one of the best players on her school's baseball team.

"At 16 years old, he said to his mother and me, 'I been your son for the last 16 years. I'll be your daughter for the next 16 years,'" Martinez said. "Transgender was not even in our vocabulary for Deb [his wife and Zoella's mother] and I."

Debra Martinez looked at information online and explained what she found to her husband. When it was time for Zoella to legally change her name to "Zoella Rose Martinez" at a court in Auburn, the judge made Zoella turn and thank both of her parents for being supportive. According to Craig Martinez, the judge described how rare it was for one parent to be supportive of having a Trans child, let alone both.

"Zoella was confident in who she was," Martinez said.

One day, Zoella asked her family to come to a restaurant in Burien, where she stood up and told everyone that she was Transgender. Martinez also brought up how when Zoella began her transition, his wife surprised Zoella with her first bra and Zoella cried, because she knew her mother accepted her transition.

"Six shots. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang," Martinez said, as he tapped the microphone with his hand. "This is what goes through our heads now. The words from my wife the day that they found her in the alley: 'She's gone.'"

"Our love has been murdered," he said, as he highlighted how bright and smart she was.

"Don't do business alone. Don't! Keep up," he continued. "Let your friends be seen with you coming. Did you have to talk alone? Your friends can sit at a table nearby. No excuses! You don't have friends? Call your mom! It's just somebody else being there."

"Nothing. Nothing is worth your life. You don't just die, your family dies," he added. "Stick together or we die! What? Stick together or we die! That's the bottom line."

Martinez's words came off as poetic, heartbreaking, and empowering all at once. He touched on how Zoella was murdered two minutes prior to her friend showing up to the meeting location.

"To Zoella: Life goes on, don't it? But not how you expected it or would like it. And how would you dream how you dreamed it? You would have shared it. Looking back has not changed it," he said. "Dreaming of the loss just makes you hear and see it, crying, sweating, hoping. Imagine. Life gone."

Martinez and his wife Debra will never see justice in the aftermath of their daughter's murder. He acknowledged that life would go on, but that time simply means a fresh start.

"To our lovely child Zoella Rose Martinez: You are one of the reasons life was worth it," he said.

Kaitlyn Toppen — Photo by Renee Raketty  

Zoey's best friend
Kaitlyn Toppen was next on stage. She met Zoella when they were both in the first grade, and the two had been best friends for 15 years.

"His smile drew me in," she said. "Even though he was six, I knew he was someone who wasn't going to leave my side."

When Toppen was 12 years old, she underwent multiple ear surgeries. Zoella kept her company throughout the process and recovery. One thing Zoella told her was, "You're my best friend. Well, actually, you're my sister. I will always be here for you, because I know you would do the same for me."

At age 14, Zoella came out to Toppen as Gay, which was something she already knew, since Zoella played inside with Polly Pocket dolls at a young age instead of going outside in the rain. At 15, Zoella told Toppen that she was Transgender, and "Zee" was her first nickname. Toppen helped her pick out clothes found style that best suited who Zoey was.

On the day that Zoella came out as Transgender to her family, Toppen was there.

"On June 5 or 6, she announced to her whole family and that from that day forward, she was 'Zoey,' and anyone who disapproved would no longer have contact with her," Toppen said.

Toppen helped Zoella chose her name. One day she suggested the name "Zoella Rose Martinez." Originally, she worried Zoey might think it to be too basic.

"But when I said it aloud, she immediately wrote it down on her name-change form," Toppen said.

Toppen also spoke about the grief and pain she feels regarding the loss of Zoella.

"It has only been two months and 19 days since she was murdered, and I think I can speak for anyone who has gone through this before. This is the worst kind of loss you as a human will ever feel."

"I lost my sister. I lost my sister, my most loyal, kind, courageous best friend, to someone who they thought could play god, and no matter how much I wish I could turn [back] that time and bring her back, I can't," Toppen said.

Toppen added that Zoella is no longer here to tell her story, but that she would stand beside Zoella's family to forever share her story: how she was loved and accepted by so many different people, how she wanted to make friends with complete strangers, and how she was always upfront.

"She was two weeks away from finally completing her transition before she passed. Two weeks away from finally becoming the woman she felt she needed to be. Wherever she is now, though, she is finally the woman she wants to be," Toppen said.

"Zoey, we miss you and we stand here to honor you and anyone else who has been through the same thing."

Toppen also mentioned that she will forever be an ally to the LGBTQI+ community, and that Zoella inspired her to come out as bisexual.

Following the speeches, attendees went outside for the candlelight vigil, where they provided names and brief summaries of the Transgender lives that were lost to violence in the past year.

Zoella "Zoey" Martinez's alleged murderer, Jacaree Rashad Hardy, has a hearing at the King County Superior Court on Dec. 9.