You open Instagram.
The first thing you read is that a 19-year-old Trans UW student was stabbed to death on the night of Mother’s Day.
You pause, then lock your phone.
You have a meeting in a few minutes.
You wonder if your Trans client earlier that day had already heard the news. Later, you reopen Instagram.
You see this news turn national.
You read that she was found on the floor of the laundry room in her off-campus apartment building.
You see UW’s statement from the president addressing the violent loss of a Trans student and how it can be worrying to LGBTQIA+ community members.
You swipe on the same post and see that UW is scheduled to host an anti-Trans speaker that week. You look this person up and read that she detransitioned after an acid trip hallucination in high school. That evening, your mom calls you because you didn’t yesterday.
You answer.
She says she saw your name in a book she was reading.
You smile.
You ask her if this means she is going to start using your name now? She says “no.”
Tuesday
You open Instagram.
You read that the anti-Trans public speaking event was canceled due to security concerns.
You watch the detransitioner say that she isn’t afraid of Antifa, that she already experienced hell during her transition, and that she isn’t stupid.
She says truth will always win.
She says Christ will always prevail.
She says there are only two sexes and that she will be back to speak on campuses across the country, because once the conversations stop, that is when the violence begins.
Before bed, your Trans partner calls you on their lunch break during their night shift.
She tells you about her top surgery consult tomorrow that was scheduled months ago. They say they dream of what it would be like to pass as a cis woman.
Wednesday
Juniper Blessing.
You learn her name is Juniper Blessing.
Juniper Blessing. What a beautiful name.
You see photos of the suspect on Instagram. Later, you talk about the pros and cons of silicone vs. saline with your Trans partner.
After work, your Trans friend comes over to help you with some self-care tasks you’ve been struggling with. She helps you start three loads of laundry and a load of dishes.
Thursday
You see a video on Instagram of UW staff power-washing all the memorial chalk away.
You hear Juniper Blessing sing “Wildflowers.”
You learn she loved meteorology and Pokémon.
You read the family’s statement.
You learn the suspect turned himself in.
You keep repeating, “Juniper’s loss… diminishes the world.”
Friday
You read she died from blood loss.
You try to forget the number 40.
You text your Trans friend, wishing them a happy birthday.
You meet with your Trans client for coffee, and discuss their boundaries of what projects they are willing to work with as they begin their career as a freelance editor.
They tell you no transphobia and no AI. That night, you leave your other friend’s birthday party to go to the Lesbian bar and dance.
Saturday
New moon.
New haircut from your Trans friend.
You watch The Wizard of Oz with your Trans partner. When Dorothy opens the black-and-white door to reveal a colorful new world, your Trans partner cries. She says, “This is what it feels like to be Trans.”
You go to bed early.
Sunday
You go to brunch with your Trans partner’s family to celebrate Mother’s Day.
Your Trans partner’s parents bought flowers and want to go to Juniper Blessing’s memorial together.
You visit Juniper Blessing’s memorial at Red Square on UW’s campus.
You draw hearts in blue and pink chalk.
You see flowers, Pokémon plushies, Pokémon cards, Pokémon drawings, prayer candles, and a pipe cleaner bouquet.
You hug your Trans partner and cry.
Later, you both attend pole dance class together.
On the way home, you see people running to help an elderly woman who must have just fallen on the sidewalk.
They turn her over.
You see her blood-soaked face.
You look away and then back at her.
Your Trans partner tells you, “You don’t have to look.”
Monday
Your first meeting of the day is with your Trans client, who has been working at a grocery store.
You ask her how she is doing. She says, “I’m good.” Then she says, “No, sorry, that was just automatic.”
She tells you that she’s being stalked at work.
She tells you that her girlfriend thinks she can afford one week without pay and still have enough money for rent.
You send your manager a message asking if he knows of any resources to support your Trans client and that you are feeling heavy.
You ask him if he has time for a phone call.
He tells you that he doesn’t know of any resources for her and that he doesn’t have time for a call.
You spend the rest of the day between meetings researching different paid leave options, compiling resources, and looking up new job postings for her.
You open Instagram.
You read the suspect was charged with first-degree murder, but there isn’t enough evidence to indicate a hate crime.
You read about the Seattle LGBTQ Commission recommending a declaration of civil emergency for LGBTQIA+ refugees fleeing red states.
You like the post.
You keep scrolling.
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